A mother whose ex-partner beat her and threw boiling water over her is urging victims of domestic abuse to speak out.
In an eight-year campaign of harassment and violence, Mark Bagworth, 55, put crushed glass inside Tracey Coupland’s shoes, hid her car keys and urinated on the family’s rabbit. At 6’2”, he kicked 4’ 11” Tracey, who has a chronic degenerative bone disorder, as he ran up and down the hallway, until she was covered in blood.
At Lincoln Crown Court in August last year, Bagworth pleaded guilty to two charges of ABH and harassment without violence and was handed a 23-month prison sentence suspended for 2 years, 30 days of rehabilitation and a ten year restraining order. HR specialist Tracey, 51, is now rebuilding her life and is speaking out to support other survivors.
Mum of one, Tracey, from Derbyshire, says: “If I hadn’t left Mark, I think I’d have ended up dead. It took so much courage to leave him, but it saved my life. To the outside world, I had a good job, I was educated and comfortably off. People could not have dreamed what I was going through day after day. He looked so happy when he was attacking me, as though he enjoyed watching me suffer.”
Tracey suffered an eight-year-long campaign of abuse against her
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Mum Tracey said that if she hadn’t left Mark, she would have ended up dead
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Tracey met Mark over Christmas 2014 through social media. She says: “He messaged me, and it turned out he lived opposite my sister and his dad and mine had worked together for years at the same firm. I kind of felt like I knew him a little bit and could trust him.”
They chatted over the festive season and met up early in the New Year. Their relationship went well at first. Tracey says: “Mark was very charming. I was very family orientated, and we have horses, he sent me pics of his kids and grandkids and told me he loved horses. Now I realise he was just worming his way in, mirroring my interests.”
Tracey said Mark’s abuse started about six months into their relationship
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But around six months in, Mark changed. Tracey says: “One day, he flipped and screamed at us over something very trivial. Then, I noticed my car keys were missing, and he eventually found them down the back of the fridge, by which time I was late for work.
“Another time, there was a long rip in my work skirt. Then, there was glass in my shoes and in my handbag. He left at 5am for work and he’d leave my front door wide open, whilst I was still asleep, so anyone could just walk in.
Tracey said despite Mark’s abuse she actually questioned whether she was going mad
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“They were all small, subtle things, but they were Mark’s way of telling me he was angry with me. Another night, he cut up my daughter’s hair extensions. He insisted it wasn’t him, but I knew, logically, it had to be. Yet I questioned whether I was going mad.
“Once when he was very angry, he urinated on my daughter’s rabbit. Another time, he left the front door open and our kitten escaped and we never saw it again.” In arguments, Mark would throw ashtrays or pots at Tracey, who suffers from a bone disorder. Then, in February 2019, he twice threw boiling water on her.
Tracey said she was ashamed and blamed herself for what was happening
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She says: “We had visitors and I went into the kitchen to make drinks. Mark was on the phone in there and he was so angry at me disturbing him that he chucked the kettle towards me splashing my arm with boiling water. It took him two attempts to make sure he got me.
“I was so ashamed, I didn’t even cry out. I just ran upstairs to change my clothes and carried on as if nothing had happened. To the outside world, I was someone with a successful career and a happy family and I blamed myself for what was happening to me. At work, I covered my bruises with make-up and people presumed I had injuries from my horses.”
Monster Mark left Tracey covered in blood and bruises
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In July 2020, they visited his parents and when Mark became angry with his father, he took his rage out on Tracey. She says: “I could see he was building up into a temper, so I went into the kitchen. He chased me through the house and shoved me to the floor in the hallway.
“He was wearing stiff brogues, and he ran up and down, kicking me each time. He had such a happy look on his face as though he was enjoying it. He was so much bigger and stronger than me and I didn’t stand a chance. He left the house, locked us in, and took my car.
Tracey recalled Mark had a “happy look” on his face as he kicked her
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“By the end of it, I was covered in blood and bruises. He kicked me in my pubic area and it was black for weeks afterwards.” Tracey wanted to call police but Mark talked her out of making a complaint.
She says: “I threw him out many times but he’d always manage to wear me down, saying he was sorry, promising things would change. I made so many excuses for him.” In the summer, he threatened to harm both her and her daughter, yet insisted they went ahead with a planned holiday to Dorset. Though there was no violence, Mark got lost on the way to the beach one day and blamed Tracey.
Tracey reported Mark to the police following years of abuse
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Tracey said her resolve strengthened thanks to the support of a domestic violence charity
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She says: “He was screaming dreadful abuse at me on the beach, in front of families with small children. Something snapped within me and I realised I couldn’t carry on like this.” She left in secret at 3am and changed the locks at her home. She reported Mark to the police and, with the support of domestic violence charity, Derbyshire Wish, her resolve strengthened.
Mark appeared before Lincoln Crown Court last August and admitted assault and harassment. He was handed a suspended sentence. Tracey says: “By the time he went to court he already had a new girlfriend, and he was telling her exactly the same things and making the same promises he did with me.
“He has just moved onto the next victim, and it is so important for women to be aware of this man. Mark worked hard to keep me where he wanted me; frightened, isolated, ashamed and helpless. I hope my story can reach others. It’s so important to know that help is out there.”
For confidential support, call the 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 or visit womensaid.co.uk. If you or your family have lost a friend or family member through fatal domestic abuse, AAFDA (Advocacy After Fatal Domestic Abuse) can offer specialist and expert support and advocacy. For more info visit** www.aafda.org.uk**.